Star Trek - "The First Doorway"

Fiction by Tina W. Pole

"The First Doorway" originally appeared in the STAG fanzine CAPTAIN'S LOG #10, and is reprinted here with the kind permission of the author and the president of STAG, Lynne Bannister.

* * * * *

It was just great, he told himself, here he was in command of his very first vessel, nobody telling him what to do, nobody watching his every move.

'Captain James T. Kirk, sole commander of the mmm... must have a name for my ship, I know... the Enterprise, yes that's it, we'll call her the Enterprise. Check all stations, we're ready to launch, open hanger deck doors...'

"Cadet!" the voice, of what sounded like one very annoyed instructor, quickly brought him right back down to Earth. He thumbed the external intercom switch, wondering what he had already done wrong.

"Sir?"

"You may have followed every procedure correctly Mister Kirk, however there is one thing that you have overlooked..."

Kirk couldn't think what it could be.

"You've forgotten to switch the main simulator on!" The voice shouted.

"Oh!... er... yes, sir, I'll do that right away sir." 'Idiot..' he told himself, as he stabbed the necessary button, and then started going through the whole procedure again, 'you're getting over confident, fancy forgetting a simple thing like that!'

"You're clear for launch," a voice said over the shuttle's communications panel. And he was off again.

'Forget about the outside world, this is for real...'

It was easy, he'd really paid attention to all his lessons, except... he couldn't understand how it could be so, he'd never felt the slightest nausea during space flight before, either in the simulator or when travelling on board a real life situation shuttlecraft service before.

'It's nerves Jim, just nerves... alright, so the outcome of your career is connected with this flight... just calm down, it'll pass, you'll be just fine.'

But he wasn't. He manoeuvred his way through the meteorite belt, the ion storm, the fight with the alien starship, dealt with the emergency power failure and eventually the landing, then staggered out into the daylight and the reality of the Academy complex. Not caring what they thought, and really having no choice, he sank to the floor and lay himself down to die.

"What the hell's happened to you?" The instructor asked, as he looked down at the pale faced cadet.

"Feel sick..." Kirk managed to murmur from where he lay, prone on the floor.

"Sick..." the instructor looked grim, "Sick, as in travel sickness?"

"Yes..." Kirk confessed, knowing the consequences of his confession.

The instructor shook his head. "I'm sorry Kirk, although you did a brilliant job with that shuttle, I can't possibly pass you, you do understand, don't you?"

"Yes, sir..." He understood only too well. The slightest defect and the Academy didn't want to know.

"There are of course other branches..."

Kirk shook his head, the last thing he wanted was one of those `ground' based jobs, he wanted to get out into space, eventually wanted a ship of his own.

"Maybe the Admiral can persuade you otherwise, you've got so far in the course, and you're good material."

Kirk said nothing, he was feeling too upset for words, all his hopes and dreams shattered.

"Well you can't lie there all day Kirk... I'll call a stretcher."

'Stretcher, no fear... Finnegan's bound to be hanging around out there, waiting to pounce. Thing's are bad enough.' He thought. "I'll be alright, sir." He climbed shakily to his feet.

"Yes, well go and lie down in your quarters for now."

"Can't, I've..." He was going to say, another class, but then what was the use of continuing.

"Give it a miss." The instructor said, "You'll catch up easily enough."

'Negative, Mister!' Kirk thought, suddenly feeling extremly angry with the outcome of things. 'I'm packing my bags and leaving this place, I'll change my name so they can't trace my records, then I'm going to try my hand at that apprenticeship with Neon Lines, I'll show them. I'll have a ship of my own yet. Space sickness, I've never had it before, might never have it again, I'm not going to let a little thing like that stand in MY way!' Amazingly he suddenly felt 90% better, and marched out of the room muttering "never say die" incantations to himself.

* * * * *

He sat in the outer office nervously twiddling his thumbs, and occasionally glancing up at the sour faced security guard who stood at the door. So much for leaving the Academy, if only he hadn't been so impatient, and had sat down and planned his escape, now what... he was under arrest and sitting in the Admiral's outer office. The Admiral would NOT take kindly to his attempted desertion.

'Still to hell with them all, I'm not going to worry. I don't belong to the Academy anymore.'

"Kirk." The shuttlecraft instructor stood in the Admiral's doorway, beckoning him in. Kirk reluctantly followed him into the office. The first person he saw was Finnegan, and a very subdued and red faced one at that.

"Sir?" He looked from Finnegan to the Admiral who sat behind his desk, looking anything but friendly.

"Mister Kirk, when you enter my office, you will stand to attention!"

He automatically jumped to attention, at the same instant cursing himself, he didn't belong here anymore, why should he?

"That's better, now then where the hell did you think you were going?"

Kirk swallowed hard, he kept on telling himself he didn't belong anyway, but...

"I am waiting for an explanation!"

"I failed the shuttlecraft test sir..." He heard himself mumble, "It wasn't worth staying, I'm only interested in..."

"There's more to Starfleet than commanding Starships." The Admiral barked at him, before he had time to finish his explanation.

"Yes, sir."

"And what were you going to do instead? Join the Klingons or something?"

"No, sir, of course not, I... I" He didn't want to tell him. He still had every intention of leaving.

"You what?" the Admiral asked.

But Kirk refused to open his mouth. But then as well as having a very forceful character, the Admiral also had the knack of seeing straight through his students.

"I'll tell you what you were going to do," he said. "You were going to take up some crummy apprenticeship with a commercial liner, eh! Change your name and all that..."

Kirk felt himself blush. Coming from the Admiral, all those high and mighty plans seemed down right childish.

"Finnegan," the Admiral turned to the other, "You got him into this mess, you explain what you did."

Kirk looked at Finnegan, so it was HIM, and at that precise moment realisation dawned.

"I removed the stabilisers in the simulator shuttle," Finnegan told him, confirming his revelation, "and made one or two other adjustments to make things uncomfortable for you."

"So you did pass that test, Kirk." The instructor said, "Top marks as well, as you handled her so well, under - how can I put it - adverse conditions."

Kirk couldn't believe his luck, so he could go on, he could... OH! He looked at the Admiral.

"You have something you want to say to me Cadet?"

"Er... yes, sir," He said rather sheepishly, "I'm er... sorry for any trouble I've caused, and er... request permission to stay the course."

"On one condition, I want you to put down in writing, that should you fail to make the grade, you will take up another branch in the services."

Kirk smiled, "It's a deal, Sir."

"Right, that's that sorted out. However there is a matter of discipline, although it was through no fault of your own, that you got yourself into this situation, you were rather pig-headed about it."

"Yes, Admiral."

"A month without leave, agreed?"

Kirk nodded and managed to keep his face straight, thinking... 'Great, that means I won't have to waste my weekends at Aunt Clare's or fight off the advances of her oldest daughter.'

"As for you Finnegan," The Admiral actually smiled, "You haven't done your test yet, have you?"

"Er... no sir."

"Right, well you can do it without stabilisers as well..."

'The perfect end, to an otherwise perfectly rotten day,' Kirk thought, as he followed Finnegan out into the corridor.

'And although I may have had to get to it through a rather roundabout way, I've made it... gotten to that first doorway, the one which will lead me to the stars!'